{{NSFW}}
The other day, I was sitting in the kitchen when what should I see but a jar of peanut butter sitting on the counter. I couldn't help myself, I had to get up and go over there. It was so hot; so sexy that I just lost all control. I had to have it right then.
A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell, but let me tell you, that jar of peanut butter made me feel more like a man than any woman ever has. Just as I was about to reach that secret bliss, I hear the door opening behind me. I turn around and who should I see but my room mate. He sees me standing there with my pants around my ankles and my dick in a jar of Skippy and he absolutely hits the roof and demands that me AND the peanut butter get out right then.
How do I make everything okay with him again? We were just like Bert and Ernie, but now he hates me and the peanut butter. Help me.